Burnt Christmas

A Christmas carol for global warming –
Appropriately enough, to the tune of Blue Christmas.

Some say a burnt Christmas will hound us
As greenhouse gas-fueled changes confound us
Chemicals in the breeze bring us all to our knees
And Santa’s just a dream, babe, when the ice caps cease to freeze
We’ll see a burnt Christmas, they’re certain
As nature pulls that tropical curtain
Scientists say we’re doomed, that the end’s coming soon
And we’re in for a burnt, burnt Christmas

Yeah, it’s a burnt Christmas that’s coming
The change to celebrations is numbing
Plastic trees wilt at home and the snow’s Styrofoam
Instead of Santa’s elves we’re stuck with a flock of garden gnomes
Though Grandma’s not run over by reindeer
Poor Santa’s down with heat stroke – it’s plain, dear
We’re not doing alright on this hot silent night
‘Cause we’re in for a burnt, burnt Christmas
Yeah, we’ll all have a burnt, burnt Christmas
I smell smoke – it’s a burnt, burnt Christmas