I wish I was a TimeLord with a TARDIS of my own;
Like Dr. Who, I'd up and go where no one's ever gone!
Though TimeLords live on Gallifrey, they're rarely ever there
Because the universe awaits… so I'd go everywhere!
I'd disappear from Baltimore, appear in Ancient Rome,
Then sprint around the galaxy before I toddled home.
I'd rid the universe of all the evils that I found
'Cause villains pop up everywhere—they NEED to be smacked down!
The first bad guys to feel my wrath would be the Cybermen;
I don't know if they're worse than Borg, but they MUST go! I'd then
Exterminate the Dalek hordes—they kill for fun; that's BAD!—
And whack Sontarans on the neck. (That's just to make 'em mad!)
But once the universe was safe and no one had to fear,
I'd spin by Earth for fish and chips (you only get 'em here)
Then find myself a quiet place where TimeLords can relax,
Retire, and live off memoir sales… and not pay income tax.
I'd like to get a TARDIS, but the task is kinda biggish
Since only TimeLords get one… and it looks like they're all British.