Our turkey started smoking while
He sizzled in the fryer;
His noxious odor proved our cooking
I.Q. should be higher.
Like some leftover dinosaur,
His fossilized remains
Prove only that he might have once
Roamed wild upon the plains.
Today his stench and blackened flesh
Remind us of this blessing:
That we aren’t bought by inept cooks
Whose skills are so depressing.
At least the stuffing turned out right;
The gravy mix did too.
I guess the turkey hot dogs
In the fridge will have to do.